Monday, January 4, 2016

No Turning Back

So a lot lately, I've been excusing my love for Taylor Swift and Maddie & Tae and all those other random artists and songs. Who are all secular and don't sing of good things. Sure they might not sing of bad things, but that's not the point in trying to make here. But my excuse was, they don't sing of bad things like sex or drugs, and I can't expect the world to act like Christians. But you know what? They sing of hate and anger and revenge and partying and rebellion, and they even imply that they have sex -- just imply. Even Taylor Swift, who's the "good girl" of the music industry and Hollywood.
But last night, I was listening to Adele with my best friend B in our church bathroom. Then a woman who I respect and love came in and asked us what we were listening to, whether it was Christian or secular. She began to talk to us, not lecture, about how a little bad in something good can be poisonous. And usually I would just dismiss her opinion as an opinion and not a fact, but that night I just couldn't get it out of my head. And I'd been feeling God just tugging at my heart saying, this is what's wrong Heidi, just give it to me. For so long I'd been hearing God's still, small voice. I wasn't willing to give God my all. For so long, I'd been hearing God call me. I heard and answered the call to be a missionary back in February, but I wouldn't give my entire life to him, cuz then I thought I wouldn't have any fun. The biggest thing I couldn't give him was music and other obsessions. A few weeks ago, I gave him my obsessions except my music.
Last night, I finally surrendered everything -- every. Thing. Including friends and music. And just before I made that life changing choice, I'd heard "I Have Decided to Follow Jesus." Like, wow, God! And I honestly have now. I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back. No turning back.

Who knew that a little conversation could impact me so much?

God, everything you do is in perfect timing. The year is just beginning. You are amazing. What a way to start the year! Thank you for everything you do! My lips will continually sing your praise!


  1. YES HEIDI. Just yes.
    i've been following your blog for a while now, and i can honestly say that you seem to be growing spiritually. which is like awesome <3 i'm still learning, and it's awesome to meet other Christians who want to learn more about God. Growing up, I never got the chance to listen to secular music, and sure, maybe for a little bit i was like, "hey i want to listen to what all these kids are saying is in.", after going through life, those songs will never help me. they're not going to hold me up in the storms of life. sure they might talk about standing strong and everything on self....but, how? MYSELF is a weak thing, a crazy weak thing. and if i'm going to base my confidence on me, well, then, there goes life.
    But with GOD? Yeah, amazing, loving, all powerful God, with HIM i can do valiantly. with HIM i can know who i am and rest secure.
    okay yeah this is turning out really long but i just love this kind of posts/discussion and yeah <3 lovely post.

  2. Thank you for your feedback and your comment! :)
    Yes, I am starting to realize that. And yes, even though there are songs out there that did boost my confidence, I've found more confidence in God because that's where my real worth is.
    Thank you for commenting! :)


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